PDA

View Full Version : The Tao of NOT doing


LoveIsTheAnswer
05-24-2008, 02:43 AM
Many times one asks themselves "What must I DO ?"

It is important to remember that there are TWO reasons why one's life is not going the way one would like.

One reason is NOT doing the things that one SHOULD be doing.
The other is DOING things that one SHOULDN'T be doing.

Both these actions will separate one from one's goal.

A couple of weeks ago, an acquaintance of mine told me of his plans to start his own business - making "Life Story" videos for people. He successfully produced his first demo DVD and did quite a good job of it however, when I watched the video, it was very apparent to me that the quality of the soundtrack was nowhere near as good as the video. Certain sections had a lot of hiss and background noise.
Having been in audio editing for many years, I pointed out that this could be improved and he agreed.

I felt that he was on a winner with his business idea and that it would be somehow worth the effort to assist him to make a truly high-quality production. I told him I would fix the problem.

I spent about four hours the next night disassembling the soundtrack and applying noise and hiss reduction to the various sections as required. I could not treat the entire track in one fell swoop as the different sections had different levels and degrees of the problem.

When I finished, I rang him and told him it was ready. As he was not able to come and pick up the track due to lack of transport, I agreed to drive over and deliver it via memory stick (the file was 130Mb so I could not email it).

He seemed most grateful and so I left with a good feeling that I had assisted him.

After a few days, I was tidying up my computer and came across the file.
Thinking that there was no further use for it, I deleted it.

BIG mistake.

THAT NIGHT, he rang me and asked if he could have another copy of it as he had somehow LOST it. Furthermore, it was now urgent as he had gotten an interview with a radio station and needed to present it in a couple of days.

So I spent another four hours doing it again, despite being sick at this particular time with a bad case of bladder stones.

Later I pondered how I had managed to maneuver myself into this unpleasant situation.

There were TWO things I did wrong.

One was to delete the file. That was something I DID that I SHOULD NOT have done until I was sure he had finished the job.

The other was that I did not charge him anything for my work, thinking, as I have done many times over the years that he would naturally understand how much effort went into it. That was something I DIDN'T do that I SHOULD'VE done.

I know now that were I to have charged him a few hundred dollars for the work, then he would have not lost that file so easily because it would have been far more valuable to him. As it was, he did not attach any value to it because it was free and he had NO idea of how much work it represented.

Anyway, AGAIN I cursed myself for doing a "Love job" and AGAIN I promised myself that I would not do it again.

I hope I listen next time.

Anyway, the point is that if you want to truly change your situation, don't JUST think about what you SHOULD do to change things, but consider all the things you ARE doing that are separating you from your goal.
Both are important.

patric
05-25-2008, 04:43 AM
Hi LoveIsTheAnswer,

There's always Murphy Law - that something will go wrong.

But maybe, your friend highly appreciates your "Love Job" and felt the
same lost as you do?

And in return, he might be 'paying' you in another form of contribution
because life work's in a funny way that we can anticipate but there's
a saying that goes, "everything happens for a reason."

I like to complete it to... "everything happens for a reason to
empower my life better."

Just like how Steve Jobs address this for his life at http://youtube.com/watch?v=UF8uR6Z6KLc

LoveIsTheAnswer
05-25-2008, 07:33 AM
The belief that all things happen for one's betterment is one I share.
Sometimes, however, it may be difficult to see how an "unfortunate" incident could possibly be for one's benefit.
In this case, I neglected to listen to that "small voice" (some call it "intuition") that said "DON'T delete the file yet!" and chose, instead, to follow the predilection of my "monkey mind" which said "No, delete it - he's got a copy and you need to free up the space anyway".
The lesson here was, I believe, that I need to listen to the small voice - if I did, it would have saved me a whole lot of work.

So yes, Patric - you are correct - ALL things happen for one's betterment - even if they hurt :)

Andrew
08-28-2008, 04:24 AM
You're certainly right about that small voice, yet so many of us shrug it away as something silly.

BonzaiLove
09-25-2008, 05:21 PM
The belief that all things happen for one's betterment is one I share.
Sometimes, however, it may be difficult to see how an "unfortunate" incident could possibly be for one's benefit.



Sure thing! And you know what, you might never find out! Maybe having "missed that golden opportunity" by not listening to that little voice made sure you didn't cross the street and got overrun the next day :)... I think we can never really know...but I also believe everything comes to us for a reason and it's always for your own betterment.